How to make the Wii U succeed, and the future of Nintendo

John and I got into heated debate over this topic, and it led to this blog post.

We're heading towards electronic device singularity. Smartphones are growing, laptops are shrinking, tablets are available in ten different sizes. "Smart TVs" are the future, as televisions and computers eventually become indistinguishable from one another--the only question is how big you want your screen to be. Standalone game consoles will soon be a thing of the past. They're the doomed arcades of this generation.

Sony already makes TVs, along with tons of other electronics. I could easily see twenty years from now, instead of buying a PlayStation to play games, you can just play them on your Sony television.

Microsoft is already integrating Xbox into its regular computers. Their newest operating system, Windows 8, uses the Xbox brand for its multimedia functions.

The PlayStation 4 and Xbox One are already evolving from game consoles into entertainment centers, preparing for the inevitable electronics singularity.

Where does this leave Nintendo? They're the only game hardware manufacturer left that doesn't make any non-gaming stuff. And the Wii U is floundering for any sort of cultural relevance.

The Wii U is a well-designed console with great potential. But Nintendo can't seem to figure out how to market it. The huge casual fanbase that bought the Wii isn't sticking around for the Wii U. And "hardcore" gamers flock towards the PS4 and Xbox.

The ace up Nintendo's sleeve that Sony and Microsoft will never have is an epic back catalogue. They've got 30 years' worth of classic games dating back to the Nintendo Entertainment System. And as the average age of gamers goes up, this nostalgia factor becomes increasingly important. There are more and more gamers who don't just want the newest releases, but want the old games that reconnect them with their childhood.

The original Wii boasted a huge Virtual Console library that featured not only old Nintendo consoles, but Sega consoles, as well as more obscure systems like the TurboGrafx, Neo Geo, Commodore 64, and even a few arcade releases.

This is all untapped potential on the Wii U. Its Virtual Console currently features only NES and Super NES games, and even its NES/SNES library is shockingly incomplete. The fact that many major first-party classics like Super Mario Bros. 3 and The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past are still unavailable on the Wii U VC is downright embarrassing. Nintendo should be ashamed.

Even if Wii U's new releases are lacking and its third-party support is close to zero, it could compete with Sony and Microsoft if its scant Virtual Console library were expanded. To start, we need what the original Wii had. Nintendo 64 games, and hopefully all the third-party consoles as well.

And what about more recent consoles? What if the Wii U VC sold GameCube games? What about Sega Dreamcast games? I salivate at the thought of Metroid Prime and Shenmue on my Wii U.

Nintendo president Satoru Iwata acknowledged back in November that they need to step up their Virtual Console offerings. I hope he carries through on this promise.

I was skeptical of Nintendo's newest portable console, the 3DS, when it first came out as well. Like the Wii U, it seemed gimmicky and lacking a real library of games. And in our smartphone-filled world, are portable consoles already obsolete?

But the 3DS proved me wrong. It eventually stood up on its own two (figurative) feet and now boasts an impressive catalogue of titles. And it's sold dozens of millions of units worldwide.

The Wii U could do the same thing. Despite all Nintendo's shortcomings, they have a core fanbase of Nintendo fans who continue to support them through thick and thin.

No matter what Nintendo does with their hardware, fans know there'll always be a good Mario game, a good Zelda game, Super Smash Bros., Mario Kart, and hopefully a good Metroid game. This commitment to consistent first-party releases is what's keeping the company alive, even as third-party publishers abandon the Wii U.

But this is the same thing that happened a decade ago to Sega, another gaming-only hardware/software manufacturer. Will the Wii U be Nintendo's Dreamcast? Ten years from now, will Nintendo simply make software for Sony and Microsoft consoles?

Maybe I'm short-sighted, but I can't see it happening. I'm optimistic Nintendo will eventually capitalize on its Virtual Console, and along with a steady stream of quality first-party releases, they'll weather the storm and continue to find their own niche in the gaming landscape. As Sony and Microsoft move away from the game console concept, Nintendo will continue to chug along as a gaming hardware/software manufacturer like it has for the last 30 years. I hope.

I Am Tired of All These Motherfuckin' Clichés in This Motherfuckin' Industry!

Motivation is difficult to pin down. Do you act in self-interest or in altruism? Do you hate yourself? Or others? Do you love yourself? Or others? Or something?

The reason I ask is that it seems like in nearly every game, movie, novel, etc. I’ve experienced recently has used the all-too-familiar last minute betrayal as its ultimate story device.

Man, am I tired of that shit.

Does absolutely no one have a solid character? Does absolutely no one have any principles? All of these characters go through the entirety of the time we spend with them as one set of thoughts, feelings, and desires, but then, in the blink of an eye, all of the goodwill built up disappears entirely. If done well, there are clues along the way that someone is going to betray you, like Cypher in The Matrix or Wesker in the original Resident Evil, but it seems like nearly every game, book, and movie thinks it needs to have some sort of twist to make it more interesting to its audience.

Perhaps this is simply a sign of poor writing or poor choice on the viewer’s part. Final Fantasy Tactics, the original one for the PSX, is Game of Thrones through and through, and it’s just as complicated and ridiculous. Some of the betrayals in that game are unexpected and surprising, but to the benefit of the overall story. They’re caught up in an epic power struggle that none of them can escape of their own volition. Except Ramza.

[SPOILERS]

But The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds’ betrayal is pointless. At the end of the game, the alternate Princess Hilda for whom you’ve been working to bring peace back to Lorule, decides that she’s actually pretty stupid and tries to kill you and your entire kingdom of Hyrule. She, Hilda that is, knows just as well as Zelda that acquiring the Triforce means that you can make any wish you like to any effect, practically without consequence, and yet she decides that she has to destroy Link and Zelda's planet to save hers. Perhaps it can be put up to temporary insanity, but it felt to me like the classic clichéd “oops, time to kill you because no reason” ending. And I was quite disappointed that it took that turn.

But it didn’t tarnish the game. The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds is the finest Zelda game I’ve played since Ocarina of Time. Thank god for that.

You got lucky this time.

Space Dandy is a look into the future of entertainment

Note: This is the first post by new contributor Tim Sebring! -Jake

Last summer the world got rocked by Guillermo del Toro’s epic Pacific Rim. It was about giant robots punching giant monsters and was well received by critics who praised the visual effects and the general aesthetic of the film.  The same couldn’t necessarily be said of the US box office response. The film’s American take was only about $101 million, $89 million short of its original production costs.  In the movie industry of only a few years ago, this would have been a very bad thing.  Pacific Rim would’ve gone down in history as one of those legendary sci-fi flops in the vein of Battlefield Earth or Lost in Space.  But then China happened. The international box office happened, and the film proceeded to make three times its domestic profit abroad.

This makes sense in context of the movie itself.  Pacific Rim was compared to Independence Day when it was first released both in tone and because the two share a number of archetypical story beats.  Both are about an alien invasion and the united human effort to defend the world from total destruction. That said, Independence Day is very much an American affair.  The story takes place exclusively within our borders (barring a few sequences depicting what’s going on around the world) and the main characters are all red-blooded Americans.  Heck, it’s even implied that the entire world is basically waiting for the United States’ go-ahead to actually start fighting back against the invaders.  The film tries to salvage that in the late game when Bill Pullman’s President makes a speech citing that the date of the Fourth of July will no longer be just an American holiday, but the sentiment rings false.

John's Favorite Last Gen Game Music

This is my favorite game music from the PS3 and Xbox 360 generation:

“End of Small Sanctuary” by Akira Yamaoka – Silent Hill 3 HD Collection (PS3, Xbox 360)

This is actually two generations old, but I feel that with the Silent Hill HD Collection release, this technically fits the bill. This plays near the beginning of the game and it totally contrasts the horror to come with its soothing, repetitious riff. More than an excellent video game song, this is one of my absolute favorite songs. Akira Yamaoka is a talented composer: the entire soundtrack to Silent Hill 3 is special.

“Less Talk, More Rokk” by Freezepop – Guitar Hero II (PS2, Xbox 360)

At the time when Guitar Hero was really getting popular, I knew Freezepop only from its first Guitar Hero contribution, “Get Ready 2 Rokk.” I enjoyed that one, too, but it wasn't until I played through and unlocked “Less Talk” that I pursued more of the synthpop sounds that they now had bouncing around my head. To this day, this is a top-10 song in my personal favorites.

Frank Miller, Daredevil, and my problem with Batman

I have mixed feelings on Batman. Gotham is an ultraconservative's wet dream, a dystopian world where the unwashed masses of the city can't depend on Big Government to take care of them. They turn to a suburban Old Money libertarian to rise above the law and save the urban plebes from themselves. Christopher Nolan's recent film trilogy capitalizes on this interpretation of the character, and Scott Snyder's current run on the Batman comic does the same.

Or he's just a goofy guy in tights who lives with a young boy and butler/father figure. The 1960s Adam West TV show uses this iteration of the character, from the Silver Age Batman comics.

Frank Miller's work on Batman in the 1980s was pivotal in establishing the Serious Business version of the caped crusader. 1986's The Dark Knight Returns is one of my all-time favorites. I recently got around to reading 1987's Year One, but I came away with a foul taste in my mouth even though it's cited by many as the definitive Batman origin story and one of the best comics of all time.

I absolutely love Year One's art, by illustrator David Mazzucchelli and colorist Richmond Lewis. Both artists previously worked with Miller on Daredevil: Born Again the year before, and while Born Again is a great story, the art takes a huge step forward in Year One. The difference is Lewis' coloring, which she re-did for the collected edition release. Colorists are often overlooked in comics, but she made a huge difference here.

That leaves Miller's script as my source of Bat-strife. He's one of the most influential comic book creators of all time. What happened?

Miller's The Dark Knight Returns, Daredevil: Born Again, and Batman: Year One comprise a trilogy of sorts. Dark Knight Returns and Born Again were published concurrently in 1986, and Year One came the following February. While people love to compare the two Batman stories to each other, you'd be remiss to overlook Daredevil.

Batman and Daredevil are very similar characters. Both are orphaned rich guys who spend their free time fighting crime in gritty urban locales, both wearing costumes that use traditionally evil imagery. But while Daredevil is a hero of the people, Batman is only a hero for the people.

Daredevil's alter ego Matt Murdock was born and raised in the rough Hell's Kitchen neighborhood in Manhattan. He grew up poor, but got into law school and worked his way up the social ladder. Nevertheless, he remains connected to Hell's Kitchen, and does the majority of his crime-fighting there. In Born Again, Murdock constantly talks about how despite the rampant crime and poverty in Hell's Kitchen, it's still his beloved home.

Batman's alter ego Bruce Wayne grew up as part of Gotham's upper crust. Though he fights crime in the inner city, he lives on the outskirts at Wayne Manor, far away from the riffraff downtown.

Austin's Fave Five Games of 2013

5. XCOM: Enemy Within

Sure, this entry is "merely" an expansion to last year's best game, XCOM: Enemy Unknown, but it was still one of my most anticipated video game releases of the year.  Thankfully it lives up to my expectations. Enemy Within adds enough content to give even those that squeezed every last second of play time out of Vanilla XCOM reason enough to sink in another batch of hours.  Still asking why is Enemy Within is a worthy addition? Not only does it include new enemies, new missions, new maps, new items, and more story, but it allows you to soup up your squad with new abilities, the likes of which give them chameleon skin and the ability to jump large buildings in a single bound.  Most importantly though, Enemy Within allows you to cybernetically augment your soldiers to have power armor.  When you add mechs to one of my favorite games it gets even favoriteier.

4. The Typing of the Dead: Overkill

Proper typing form never struck me as particularly important to learn, and then came Typing of the Dead,  a revamp of House of the Dead 2 that replaced the light gun with a keyboard.  A brilliantly quirky idea that by all accounts should have been a one time deal.  An idea that was suddenly and surprisingly given new life this year when Typing of the Dead: Overkill was released out of nowhere.  There was no announcement of the game's release.  No hype.  No fanfare.  Just all of a sudden the game is available for purchase, and purchase I did.  The difference between TotD:Overkill and the original TotD is the game the typing is placed over.  The original was a game full of hilarious bad voice acting, but Overkill is full of self-deprecating humor.  Other than that it's more or less the same thing, which is OK in my book.  Even if you're tired of zombie game,s pick up Typing of the Dead: Overkill and remember what makes them so fun to kill (hint: it's typing dirty words to shoot them in the head).  Look for it on your favorite digital distribution platform.

3. Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon

While I might never have gotten around to playing Far Cry 3 due to lack of time, its standalone expansion Blood Dragon was a game I made sure to make time for.  You get to play as a laser gun wielding badass cyborg soldier who is trying to save America and get revenge for his dead friend by going after a dude who is part robot, part Bennet from Commando, and part Brando from Apocalypse Now.  The game's concept was enough to enthrall me since badical action movies are in many ways the pinnacle of cinema.  A self aware sense of humor keeps everything in check by making fun of and embracing the well trod cliches of videogames and action movies.  Basically Blood Dragon is Spec Ops: The Line if it had good gameplay and was fun. [I HEARD THAT - Jake]

2. Salty Bet

Is it even a game?  Sure, why not.  For those not in the know, Salty Bet is a stream where two AI players use randomly selected characters in the M.U.G.E.N. engine while the human players bet virtual money on which character they think will win (check it out here).  This means the player actually watches a contest between two computers, and perhaps that makes it the ultimate anti-game and puts critically acclaimed looking simulators like Gone Home to shame [I HEARD THAT - Jake].  Salty Bet is a bizarre experience where matches are simultaneously hilarious in their absurdity and absolutely terrifying as you watch all of your salty bucks disappear in a flash.  It's a phenomenon like no other as the range of characters is seemingly limited only by the imagination (or lack thereof) of the online community as it takes advantage of nearly every character created for M.U.G.E.N., so you wind up with ripped character models from other games to crude MS Paint drawings.

The matches vary just as much as fights could be. Seemingly real balanced fights take place, absolute one-sided annihilation as someone's ridiculous (some might even say Mexican [Mexican in Salty lingo means unbalanced and overpowered]) pet creation commits war crimes on helpless victims, and then there is the dreaded "potato fight" where two computers that are a bit touched in the head have a fight about as awkward as I am in social settings.  Jake once asked if it was "anime wrestling" to which I responded it is "fictional character Thunderdome" with an added betting element.  Funny fights are punctuated by the bettors' contradictory rules in regards to betting (always bet Dragon Ball Z vs. never bet Dragon Ball Z).  My personal rule of thumb when it comes to betting is just bet for your favorite character.  Will dreams.exe finish installing or will you find yourself back in the salt mines?

1. Dynasty Warriors 8

I'm going to take a bold stance that'll probably invalidate my opinions to the public at large and say I unequivocally love Dynasty Warriors.  Virtually murdering hundreds of dudes in the span of a couple minutes with flashy combo attacks relieves stress like nothing else, and that's what Dynasty Warriors 8 does with unmatched excellence. Everything I like about the series is present in this release, but there are some welcomed new features as well.  The biggest addition is rock-paper-scissor type of system that reduces the tedium involved when fighting enemies that don't stop blocking.  Those that never understood the appeal of the franchise won't change their minds due to DWar8, however their stances might soften a bit as gameplay tweaks add some needed freshness to the series.  Games that change the way we think about videogames are great, but sometimes I just need a simple game that knows exactly what it is.  Dynasty Warriors 8 is my favorite game of the year because I can revel in the the escapist fun provided by 80+ unique characters fighting hordes of nameless enemies for hundreds of hours.

2013 music year in review, by Luke

2013 wasn’t exactly the best year to have occurred in music history, especially that of the guitar driven genre. As you can imagine, this made it hard to create a list worth publishing at the end of a year that witnessed what seemed like a drought in new music. I admit the albums released by my favourite bands this year were, for the most part, brilliant; but some of these albums were still lacklustre in comparison to previous works. These were my favourite bands though, and I do have a bias towards them. The bands on this list are cracking.

Young Aviators - Self Help

Jangly, fuzzy, and socialist. 

Young Aviators, hailing from Glasgow (originally Northern Ireland), are the only band apart from Elbow that has managed to excite me in years. Their debut album, Self Help, is a running social and political commentary on the modern, materialistic throwaway culture in which we live in. They are one of the very few bands actually voicing their problems with the issues of Britain and the Capitalist West. As part of the doomed generation, they are asking “where's the next job coming from? Where are our pensions going to come from? And why are we going to be left with the debt accumulated by the last bunch off toffs? Young Aviators are musically catchy, and lyrically witty, they are trying their hardest to keep us indoors and safe, away from the cruel, dark world.

Johnny Marr - The Messenger

Keeping true to himself, Johnny Fucking Marr is still as indie as ever.

Considering Johnny Marr’s original band the Smiths pretty much invented “indie,” it would be hard for this Godlike Genius to create anything less than superb. Ever since Marr’s departure from the Smiths he's kept a pretty low profile… sort of. For the last twenty odd years, Marr has popped up in several different bands, helped them out, and then moved on. However, Marr had never written an album of his own until this past year. Released in February, Johnny Marr’s solo debut The Messenger was nothing short of perfect. Filled with his signature jangling guitar that emulates about four different guitars playing at the same time, and lyrics that batter and bruise both the soul and Tory government, Marr has created an album that is stereotypically British in sound and word. The lyrics on this album are pure romantic poetry, and he doesn’t shy away from it either, opening up his whole soul for the taking. The Messenger has proven to all those unbelievers (Moza die hards) that Marr is equally as talented, if not more, than his old music partner Morrisey; He knows how to write true Northerner’s doomy gloomy poetry. All in all The Messenger delivers a good 45 minutes of sweet guitar driven music, accompanied by a perfect balance of anti-toff and personal lyrics that awaken the dreaming, romantic, socialist in you.

Foals - Holy Fire

Holy Fire, Foals went big.

Foals decided to loosen up the reigns on this album, and just let the producers go for it. The final product was a grandiose, grooving cacophony of pure melancholic gold. Angry, sad, yet hopeful, Foals’ new release was definitely the spring soundtrack to my new romance, and oh man, the in-jokes that spurred from it were by far the best i’ve ever created with anyone… And the dancing so much dancing. Foals, however, did let themselves slip slightly on the final few tracks, "Stepson" and "Moon." The tracks should be great, but there is something missing from them. I can’t figure out what it is. Luckily for them, they created some of their best work as well: "Bad Habit" and "My Number." The latter is the poppiest thing you’ll ever hear me listen to… and dance to. That bass. Foals' third album was good, and brought me much aural pleasure, but that missing link, whatever it may be, only harmed the album’s overall sound.  

Franz Ferdinand - Right Thoughts, Right Words, Right Action

Arty as art loving Artrockers can possibly make their art.

Finally! I was only waiting four bloody years for this gem. Franz Ferdinand, after a four year break and a tricky third album (Tonight), finally landed this perfectly orchestrated piece of art right onto the album shelves of every record shop in the UK. Hell’s Horses, it couldn’t have come at a better time. During the hottest summer on record for the UK, the sweltering people of these small islands needed something to mark the occasion, we couldn’t just settle for Andy Murray winning Wimbledon, no, we needed something else to celebrate winning the tennis in the hottest sumer on record. The answer was a full blown guitar attack by Scotland’s finest, Franz Ferdinand. The album was simply a combination of Franz’s first two albums, the tracks just as hooky, and just as rough. That was the problem though, if I have to pick. The band didn’t do anything different, after the terrible third album they went back and did what they did best, which is grand, but it left me feeling slightly annoyed that these four talented blokes couldn’t come up with anything more adventurous. Oh well, It was still a fun, feel good album that definitely made me want to get up and dance around the flat with my girlfriend, but it was too hot. Instead we just listened, and enjoyed the sweet riffs.

Biffy Clyro - Opposites

‘Mon the Biff!

I have to say, this album had to grow on me, and thanks to my girlfriend I gave it a chance instead of writing it off just because the lead single was not Biffy’s best. As an album, Opposites is one of Biffy’s strongest, grand in sound, full of power ballads, and alternative enough to keep the music snobs like me happy; they go into weird time signatures. The standout track from the album, "The Thaw," is a perfect guitar driven ballad. Its lyrics, both romantic and hopefuI, tell a story of mutual discovery; two people dig deeper and find the true surface to one another, where they then fall deeper in love, and grow closer together. It is heart melting, and like a true sop, I fell in love with this song. Opposites is a great album, it’s big and energetic, but also passionate and raw, and once you’re finished listening to it you have the feeling that you can conquer anything.

The best movies about how freezing it is outside

Here in the Midwest we're experiencing a fun POLAR VORTEX, with temperatures getting the lowest they've been in two decades. It's made me think about movies that remind me of how cold it is outside. A google search for "winter movies" brings nothing but articles on cozy Christmas films. I don't want those. I want movies about it being freezing outside. What's your favorite SUBZERO TEMPERATURE FILM?

The Thing (1982)

The Empire Strikes Back (1980)

Hanna (2011)

Fargo (1996)

The Shining (1980)

John's Top 5 Anticipated Games of 2014

5. Final Fantasy X/X-2 HD Remaster / Oddworld: New ‘n’ Tasty

I am the audience these remakes are intended for. I love replaying old games that I loved and had excellent times with, and I’m excited for both of these. The Oddworld games are fun and challenging and I had a great time playing through them with my friend one summer in middle school (hopefully, there will be online co-op). Final Fantasy X and X-2 aren’t my absolute favorite Fantasy games, but I’m excited to play them again, nonetheless.

Just off in the distance...

4. Bayonetta 2

I own a Japanese Wii U, so I’m pretty excited about getting this game as soon as it’s finished. I loved the first one with its ridiculously over the top sexuality and crazy Devil May Cry gameplay. All I can hope is that I’ll understand what’s going on when I get the next one.

I... think I understand...

3. South Park: The Stick of Truth

I keep inwardly debating about whether this game should actually be my number one. I love South Park: it’s got some of the best writers and storytellers in Matt Stone and Trey Parker and they’ve shown time and time again that they are not only potty-mouthed and infantile but incredibly observant, deeply sensitive satirists. I have read little of the available news about The Stick of Truth so I have no idea what it's about, but damn am I excited for it, anyway.

TOASTY

2. The Walking Dead: Season 2

Season 1 is one of the best experiences I’ve had playing games. The “game” itself is slow and easy and ridiculous when you fail because the cursor moves too slowly for you to select the right option, but the story is impeccable. Like the rest of The Walking Dead universe, it has its problems, but Lee and Clementine’s relationship will survive the test of time. I just hope Season 2 can keep pace.

 

Clem's a badass in a bad mood and she ain't taking any more of your shit, Ben! Oh wait...

First, before we get to my final choice, one for 2015: Mighty No. 9

I was mightily dismayed when I learned Mega Man Legends 3 was cancelled and that Capcom were such dicks that they cancelled it even when Inafune agreed to finish it (that game was literally the reason I bought a 3DS – yep, I was an Ambassador). This is not and will not be that game. I can only hope that a successful Mighty No. 9 might possibly open the door to Keiji Inafune making another game like Mega Man Legends. Plus, I like classic Mega Man, too. So here’s hoping.

And, finally, my number one, absolute most anticipated game for 2014 is:

Of course.

The ten best games of the last console generation, according to John

Earlier, Jake posted his ten defining games of the last console generation. Here's John's take.

(Ed. note: Ten more games, how 'bout. I definitely agree on some of Jake's choices.)

10. Wii Sports

Swish and flick.

It’s not the best game of the last generation, but more than anything, even Portal, I feel that this game defines it. This brought video gaming to an entirely new audience: everyone. Despite some general wonkiness with the controls, this game is excellent and fun to play, and it has unreal replayability. This game is fun.

9. Mortal Kombat (2011)

There hasn’t been a Mortal Kombat this fun since Mortal Kombat II and, being a sucker for story modes, I think that this one is the best Mortal Kombat of them all. The controls are excellent, the deaths are excessive and grisly, and the game has so many modes to keep your bloodthirst well and sated.

8. Uncharted

I’m going to go with the series as a whole for this one, as the first one is good, not great, the second is excellent, and the third is a little too “Naughty Dog and the Storytelling Style of The Last of Us” for me to consider it great, even though it is quite good. In my opinion, this and Assassin’s Creed are the original IPs that defined and made the action genre great last generation.

AH HAHAHAHAHA - THE CRACK! THE CRACK!

7. Crackdown

Saint’s Row fans owe a lot to this game. This game is GTA on super-powered crack without the infuriating characters. It’s been a long time since I’ve played it, but I seem to recall the protag being silent, and that’s perhaps why I had so much fun with this game… and so little with GTA. I wish I had my 360 with me so I could boot this up right now.

6. Assassin’s Creed II

This is pretty old now, but this was the third game I played last generation that made me think, “Good lord, what took me so long to play this?” This is a fantastic sandbox game set in a time of humanity’s burgeoning enlightenment to the world and its wonders and with Ezio, one of the best personalities in video games. And Leonardo Da Vinci is a character: it doesn’t get any better than that.

5. Demon’s Souls / Dark Souls

This is low on my list for the same reason that Deadly Premonition is on Jake’s. I’ve written so much about this already that I don’t need to say much more. This game will rock your cock down to your socks and you’ll love and hate every minute of it.

The original sniper mission is hard to top.

4. Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare

Call of Duty has become the war equivalent of an EA Sports game, but COD4:MW is from a time when the games actually told stories and attempted to mean something. This is one of my favorite games of all time with excellent controls, a heart-breaking story, and gorgeous visuals back when the whole idea of a really cinematic game was still a pipe dream. This game made Call of Duty a household name, and for good reason.

3. Red Dead Redemption

Rockstar is an amazing studio. As much as I don’t like Grand Theft Auto, I adore Red Dead Redemption. This is what GTA should be in terms of depth of character and story, beauty of scenery, and playability. Driving a car in GTA has never been as satisfying as riding a horse in RDR and the wide-open areas just scream to be explored, unlike the massively impressive cityscapes of Liberty City and its ilk where you’re likely to steal three or four cars and kill about twenty re-spawning pedestrians on your way from mission to mission. RDR is calmer, and I appreciate that.

2. Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow

All due respect to Jake’s choice (Order of Ecclesia is a good choice), Dawn of Sorrow is the best Castlevania game of the last generation, and an easy 1A to Symphony of the Night for best Castlevania game ever. Dawn of Sorrow is like Wii Sports in the sense that it showcased all of the potential the original DS had to offer with great music (when wearing headphones), a huge castle to explore, and the necessity to use the touch screen during boss fights to cast the spell that finishes them off for good, which, at the time, was absolutely unheard of and revolutionary. Whenever someone asks me about which Metroidvania I would recommend for them to play (which, to date, is never), this and Symphony are always the two I mention.

1. Valkyria Chronicles

It's a rag-tag bunch, to be sure.

This is a game about which I don’t talk enough. There are three Valkyria games, with 2 and 3 on PSP (3 only in Japan), but I’ve chosen the first one for the PS3 as my other number one for last generation (after all, Portal is the correct answer, as posited by Jake). In this game, you take the role of a tank commander of a fictional European country in an alternate World War II as you lead rebel forces and attempt to drive the imperial invaders out of your home country. The gameplay is interesting, as it’s a turn-based third person strategy shooter. It sounds weird, but it works amazingly well as you first position your team members around the map, then selectively move and attack with each of them a set amount of times each turn. This is also a rare game for me for which I actually purchased and played the DLC, as you continue both the story and the training of your little army. I played this game an absolute ton back when I first got it, and it’s left an indelible impression on me. 

And it’s by Sega, not that that matters. C’mooooooooon, Shenmue 3.

The ten best games of the last console generation, according to Jake

10. Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia - Konami - Nintendo DS - 2008

I've been a sucker for Metroidvania-style gameplay since I was eleven years old. While Metroid has gone on to bigger and better 3D things, Castlevania remained true to its roots and produced a slew of great 2D Metroidvania games in recent years. The series has never quite been able to make the leap to 3D, but that's okay with me.

Order of Ecclesia was the third and final Castlevania game on the DS, the series' swan song on the handheld. It features a refined art style, a more nonlinear gameworld with a brilliant Dracula's castle as well as plenty of non-castle locales, a ramped up difficulty from previous DS entries in the franchise, and *gasp* a female protagonist. What is this, Metroid?! Strangely, there's been no word of a new traditional Metroidvania-style Castlevania game since Order of Ecclesia's release six years ago.

9. NHL 14 - EA Canada - Xbox 360, PlayStation 3 - 2013

This entry counts the 360/PS3 iterations of EA Sports' annual NHL series as a whole, and NHL 14 is the pinnacle. It's not arty or deep. It's just hockey. But it's damn good. The NHL series on the seventh generation of consoles spearheaded the sports game genre's move from arcadey face button-based gameplay to full analog stick control. Instead of pressing A to pass and B to shoot, you actually use the control stick as your hockey stick. Despite my pretentious exterior, NHL is a nuanced, stress-relieving love of mine.

8. Catherine - Atlus - PS3, 360 - 2011

I was skeptical of Catherine at first. I'm generally not a fan of the grind-heavy Japanese role-playing games Atlus is known for. But Catherine is... a puzzle game? About relationships? It's got some lengthy anime cutscenes, which normally I'd be averse to but they're so well-made that I don't mind. Catherine is one of the first major deconstructions of sex and the male mind in the videogame medium, but it's also a complex, difficult puzzle game. It's very Freudian, as you may infer from the screenshot above. One of the most daring games of the last generation, which I've written about before here.

7. Limbo - Playdead - 360, PS3, PC - 2010

Jonathan Blow's Braid gets all the "arty Xbox Live Arcade indie 2D platformer" attention, but Danish studio Playdead's somber black-and-white Limbo is what really got to me. While Braid relies on blocks of text and a heavy-handed message, Limbo simply exists. It's a sort of minimalist Where the Wild Things Are meets Lord of the Flies, but much more bleak. I've written on this blog about how much I love this game before. No dialogue, no HUD, just a boy and a spider.

6. Metroid Prime 3: Corruption - Retro Studios, Nintendo - Wii - 2007

Retro Studios' 2002 opus Metroid Prime on the GameCube is my Favorite Game Ever Made. Metroid Prime 2: Echoes was much darker, tougher, and divisive, and I still loved it. The trilogy comes to an end with Metroid Prime 3: Corruption. It's the Return of the Jedi of Metroid Prime: probably the weakest of the three, but still an epic end to the trilogy. Corruption features multiple planets for Samus to explore, with trippy alien designs abounding. The series' signature atmospheric nonlinear exploration gameplay fine-tuned to perfection. It's a bummer that Retro Studios hasn't returned to the Metroid series since Corruption's release seven years ago.

5. Sid Meier's Civilization V - Firaxis Games, 2K Games - PC - 2010

Together with its expansions Gods & Kings and Brave New World, I've put more hours into Civilization V than anything else on this list. A single game of Civ V could take upwards of five hours to get through. I love this style of "4X" strategy game, since you're not just waging war against other people. You can win through economic victory, diplomatic victory, or any other number of means. Plus you can get nuked by Gandhi. And since it's turn-based instead of real-time, you get to spend forever analyzing each move you make.

4. Deadly Premonition - Access Games - 360, PS3, PC - 2010

Deadly Premonition is not a well-made game. It hardly even qualifies as a seventh-generation console game. It's full of bugs, awkward controls, terrible graphics, and a limited soundtrack. But that's all part of why I love it. Deadly Premonition is a Twin Peaks-inspired comedy horror with tons of personality. The obtuseness of it all is what makes it so appealing. It's a diamond in the rough that's become a cult classic. I've written about it before here.

3. Fallout 3 - Bethesda Game Studios - PC, 360, PS3 - 2008

This entire blog is named after the location of Fallout 3, so I'd hope it would make this list. I've got mixed feelings on open-world games, since they've all got awful pacing and dramatic tension. Bethesda's other open-world RPG series The Elder Scrolls gets much more attention than Fallout, and it's such a self-serious Tolkien ripoff that I never got too into it. But Fallout 3 hits the perfect balance of post-apocalyptic harshness with a sense of gallows humor through it all. Plus I've got the sentimental attachment of it being by far the most detailed depiction of my hometown Washington, D.C. in videogame form.

2. Mirror's Edge - EA Digital Illusions CE - 360, PS3, PC - 2008

Crazy to think after making Mirror's Edge, Swedish studio EA DICE went on to become a generic FPS factory with the Battlefield series. Mirror's Edge is ahead of its time, a first-person parkour game that was a commercial failure but has since gained respect in the gaming community. Its parkour control scheme was a paradigm shift from standard first-person controls, which turned many players off but allowed for a new type of game we haven't really seen before or since. Combine that with a minimalist color palette, airy electronica soundtrack and strong female protagonist, and Mirror's Edge is a classic. 

1. Portal - Valve Corporation - PC, 360, PS3 - 2007

It has to be Portal. It can't be anything else. What else could I choose? Valve's unassuming first-person puzzler Portal is likely the most important game of the last decade. You probably already know about Portal. There are university curriculums based around it. The most fun part of it is the fact that Portal was released with virtually zero fanfare--a short little puzzle game extra thrown in with the already-stellar Orange Box. Valve is undoubtedly the best developer of the last generation of video games, and Portal is perfection in game design.

John's 5 Feats and Failures of 2013

FAILURES

5. Ouya

If only I cared more...

I Kickstartered this bad boy and all I can say is… Hmm… Not much. I believe I turned the system on twice, maybe three times. I just have no reason to use this thing. There’s nothing compelling to play on it, and the few games I did try on it (specifically Final Fantasy III and Sonic the Hedgehog: Episode 1) ran poorly and, if I remember correctly, had no sound. All in all, meh.

4. Leisure Suit Larry: Reloaded

Not that there was much to expect from a Leisure Suit Larry game, this was still far below what a gamer deserves out of a game, remake or no, in 2013. The artwork was nice and the voice acting was pretty good, but the gameplay felt as if it was ported straight from the original and the eventual “payoff,” if you want to call it that, is a paltry reward for what was a paltry experience. Leisure Suit Larry isn’t good enough to get away without showing any tits, yo.

3. The Last of Us’ gameplay/characterization in The Novelist

This is a two-fer because I couldn’t decide which was worse and wanted both to make the list. In other reviews, The Novelist has already been criticized for its poor explication of the characters you aren’t viewing the game through (i.e. everyone but Dan), but even more than that, I feel that Linda is one of the worst female characters in American media. She is the epitome of a selfish, unsympathetic, unappreciative – I believe

I wish I remembered when you weren't such a bitch.

the word I kept using while playing the game was “cunt” – woman, and it’s nigh impossible to feel any connection to her or her desires.

The Last of Us is a very good game, but it’s repetitive. Holy SHIT is it repetitive. Toward the end of the game, I was hoping, wishing for the end to come and come quickly. My problem lies in the fact that there were two things to do in the game: walk and fight. If you weren’t walking, you were fighting, and vice versa. There was very little exploration, there was no reason to go searching for collectible items, etc. The few puzzles there were were recycled ad nauseum (i.e. floating Ellie from place to place). It was a good game and I enjoyed it, but damn, it needed some variety.

2. Beyond Two Souls

Where to begin? This game had tons of problems: the “gameplay” is awful; the story is interesting but the characters in it are all terrible, vacuous beings; the ending(s) is ridiculous and doesn’t make any sense within the narrative’s own confines. (I should amend this last, there are four endings to pick from, and two of them do make sense, albeit one of them is anything but a logical leap from the events of the denouement.) There’s more, but I don’t feel like going through it. Ellen Page and Willem Dafoe are fantastic and are the only redeeming factors in a game rife with poor direction.

1. Grand Theft Auto V

I just don’t get this game. It’s well-made with excellent production values and tons to do, but, beyond the first couple of hours (in a game intended to be played for hours and days and weeks) it becomes stale quickly.

First (and I’ve remarked on it quite a bit in this article), good characters are important for my enjoyment of a game, and this game has none. Except for Franklin. He makes sense to me, his decisions, his motivations. He feels real. Michael and Trevor, though? Fuck ‘em. Michael is a piece of shit and Trevor is only there to be shocking and outrageous, and it grates on my patience, of which I have an abundance (I teach children in my real life). This game is appealing, though, and the reason I bought it is because it’s an enormous sandbox to play around in, and I generally love those games, but this one… I just can’t do it with these guys. Maybe if I could play the entire thing as only Franklin… but I can’t.

Second, the game’s repetitive. Lots of games are repetitive. Hell, Tetris is the same damn thing for hours on end. Katamari Damacy is, too. So is Dark Souls. But they all feel different enough throughout your time with them (admittedly, not KD, but I will never not love that game) that you don’t look on your next play with dread and boredom. I couldn’t escape this with GTA. Every mission wasn’t the same, but it felt the same. To me, anyway. And I have felt this way with every single GTA I’ve ever played.

So why did I buy it? Because I keep expecting to be seduced and to fall in love because it’s beautiful and hip and cool and it has good taste in music. You have almost everything I love in a game, but I just can’t get past your ugly personality, GTA.

*sigh*

FEATS

5. Luigi’s Mansion: Dark Moon

Time to hit these books hard - with a vacuum.

I’m not sure why, but when coming up with a best of 2013 list, 3DS games were the first to pop to mind: Animal Crossing, Pokémon, the new Fire Emblem, Shin Megami Tensei IV, and this one are chief among them. Luigi’s Mansion: Dark Moon is probably the most fun out of all of them. Traveling around the house and, eventually, the town to recover different items the Professor needs to continue his ghost experiments is fun and sometimes hilarious. And the game plays really well. Many of this year’s games have suffered due to poorly implemented control schemes (I'm looking at you, Beyond Two Souls), but not this one. It plays like butter.

4. Bioshock Infinite

Bioshock was a revelation when I played it on the 360 so many years ago. The steampunk theme resonated with me being an avid Final Fantasy VII fan and the story’s climax is one of the best in any media. Infinite isn’t quite as good as the first one was, but it’s a great game. A lot of people (my friends with whom I spoke about the game, anyway) thought the story was hamfisted and not especially great and maybe even pretty predictable (which I agree with – I had it pegged within a few hours), but it was a fine experience. I had a great time working my way through Columbia and Infinite is one of the few recent games I’ve seriously considered replaying through entirely (…even though I haven’t).

3. The Stanley Parable

Better look LEFT and make the RIGHT decision in this room.

Wow. This is not a difficult game, nor is it particularly interesting or exciting in the actual playing of it, but it’s a fine game, if short, and, in my playing experience, unique. I am not traditionally a PC gamer, and so did not play the original mod. Hell, I only played this game the other day when it finally came to Steam for Mac. But it’s fun. It's really fun. I enjoyed playing with the narrator as I either conformed to or blatantly disregarded expectations. It’s as if you can actually change the course of the game. You can’t of course, but the game makes you feel like you can. And that’s the point. Until you realize you can’t.

Good game.

2. Super Mario 3D World/Pikmin 3/Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker HD

Of the three, I’d have to say Pikmin 3 is my hands-down favorite. I’ve played Wind Waker before and Mario, no matter how different-yet-similar 3D World is, is Mario. Pikmin 3 is intensely satisfying in the way that Dark Souls is. It’s nowhere near as hard, but every successful expedition is heartwarming. Every battery, berry, and button you find is a small exhilarating accomplishment whereas each battle you wage well is a large exhilarating Victory with a capital “V”. I hope they make a 3DS version, soon.

1. Pokémon X/Y

My number one game is the game I played the most. Pokémon is, by its very nature, a game you have to spend a lot of time with, training and exploring and breeding (if that’s your thing), but it’s rare that a game has the gift where you really want to spend all that time with it. This game is as charming as it is involved, and I felt like a kid again traveling the country capturing Pokémon. It’s also the first since the original Red and Blue that I played from start to finish, even going back through after the end and catching the various legendaries, or trying to, anyway.

If I had any problems with the game (I played Y, by the way) it would be these: it’s too easy (I understand, though – it’s a game for kids, after all) and there are too. Many. Pokémon. I don’t mean to sound like a mean old miser, but holy shit has the magic gone out of finding new Pokémon. Because there are so goddamn many, now. Back in the day, a new Pokémon was a somewhat momentous occasion because there would only be one or two new Pokémon in each new area you went, along with a whole rack of ones you had already seen, so randomly encountering one you didn’t have was an actual “OH SHIT AM I PREPARED FOR THIS” moment. In this game, though, it’s nearly every battle that you find a new Pokémon, and you eventually stop trying to catch them all because your money supply simply can’t keep up with the amount of Poké balls necessary to do so, and when you get to the point where you do have the means, you no longer have the will to go back through to each area to pick for the one you didn’t get the first time around.

Looking at 2013 in review, though... What a year, Nintendo.

 

Accurate representation of Nintendo Japan's work environment